Tag Archives: Uncategorized

Three Things You May Not Know About Me: #s 2 & 3

Posted on by
2

Hi-dee-ho! I have received several comments from busy readers who say that my posts are too long to read. Normally I’d advise them to piss off and learn how to take time to observe greatness, but as it is the last day of the new year, I decided to post two more tiny tidbits about me in a second entry, to make it a little more bite-sized for you of the internet generation who have the attention span of a gnat. As the sign said over my grandparents’ toilet, “I aim to please.” Of course, that was followed by, “You aim too, please!” Ah, punctuation! You slay me! Anyhoo, without further a doo-doo -I couldn’t help it, since I had already started with the toilet humor- here are two more things about me:

#2: Knot Hot – Yesterday, all day, I wore I neckerchief tied in a fetching knot because I thought it looked jaunty. In the evening, to look a bit more festive, I wore it in a band around my head. This tells me I am officially too old for hip things, like my aforementioned kicks (see previous post for more than you ever wanted to know about my kicks.) Modern cool kids don’t even know what a neckerchief is, never mind the joy of a jaunty, fetching or even rakish accessory. I am only cool if you have a fetish for Braniff stewardesses circa 1962 or for Daphne from Scooby Doo.


Actually, Daphne’s still pretty hot.

#3 – Cheese, Glorious Cheese! There are few things more satisfying on a cold winter’s day than cheese and cheese -based products. Cheese is the little black dress of food; it can be dressed up or down, depending on the occasion. It goes smoothly from: “Wine and cheese, monsieur? Can I interest you in an amuse bouche of baked brie and pear?”; to: “Hey, Loritia! Don’t be hoggin’ all the nacho cheese with yer finger! I gots to have some left fer my chip!” or, “Fire Hot Cheetos rocks my world, yo!” Cheese comes out of a cow, sheep, goat, soybean or a can. It’s ubiquitous. It represents nations (Swiss or American); home (cottage cheese); love (nothin’ speaks of a mother’s love like home made mac & cheese), and a beautiful melange of the elements (tuna = sea, melt=land and sun, the way I inhale a tuna melt= air.) Cheesecake, Cheezey Poofs, Cheese burger, Queso, Fromage, cream cheese, Cheese logs, Broccoli Cheese soup, Stuffed Jalapenos, Fried Cheese, Blue Cheese, the stinkier the better, cheese, cheese, are you ready for your close-up , I say cheese, I LOVE YOU CHEESE!

That was the third thing about me. I really like cheese.

Here is a picture I took of cheese in France. It has gray fur on it and oozes a beige, pus-like substance. I still ate it. That’s how much I like cheese.

Posted on by
1

This is, by far, my favorite Christmas song of all times. You know it, you’ve seen it, but in the spirit of the holidays, go ahead and click on it. You’ll be glad you did. I raise a glass of sweet-assed wine to you all, and hope that everyone is having a terrific holiday season, and at least one, if not three, very healthy ho’s.
By the way, if someone could help me to embed videos, that’d be a real fine gift.

Passing Phase?

Posted on by
2

I got a feeling, it’s incomplete
I got a feeling, and then it got to me…
Spoon

I think I am on the cusp. Really it’s a scary place to be, because A.) I might have to change, and B.) because I realize that unless I put my money where my mouth is and get off my ass and jam, I will heretofore live in a world of shameful regret. Nobody wants that shit. It’s awful when you have nobody to blame but yourself.
I have a friend, Orlando, who once said, “Don’t let the beauty of this world blind you from the beauty of others.” He’s got a point. I have so many things going on in this world that are positive. I have my family, whom I adore. They are everything to me. I have my girl friends, which is new to me; I’ve been a guy’s girl for most of my life. I have students who love me. They compliment me on my ponytail. That’s really kind, and sort of a deceptive, desperate pandering, but I don’t mind. I have all these people who are pulling for me, hoping I’ll make it, praying for my personal fulfillment, and I’m healthy and wealthy and live in a world of opportunity. And yet, I am getting more and more stagnant and depressed. I want to help myself, but I am so afraid to go from the fire into the frying pan. I am confined to the idea that this feeling is just a passing phase, which it may well be. What will I do? Will I leave all that is sure and holy to venture into the unknown and see what’s what out there? That’s just not like me. What about the garden? What about my parents? Still, I could change, and try something new. I do like a good adventure, and there are a million ways to be happy. I am liminal, with one foot in one reality and one in a fantasy. I ask you, what shall I do?

Photophrenic

Posted on by
2

So, I stumbled upon this photographer today, and my heart went all aflickr (get my hip, web-savvy reference?!), on account of I think this guy is soooo cool. His stuff is hyper-real and focused, and he elevates ordinary subjects to the sublime, twisted, or extraordinary. I find his pictures to be evocative and surreal. Really, I was almost giddy with the joy of discovering that which I consider inspirational. (By the way, I talk like this in real life. You won’t see me ending a sentence with a preposition- well, except in those frequent cases where I choose to ignore the rule on the grounds of artistic perrogative, and ‘giddy’ isn’t just for breakfast anymore, I tell you what!) I figured I’d just go ahead and post his link on my blog, even though I know you probably won’t check him out, no matter how I rave on about his work. Still and all, I like to spread the wic around.

Then I started thinking, what do I know about hip, or wic, or cool? I am the anti-Hip WcCool. I say, “What’s the haps, Paps?” My favorite joke is about a slug, and all I remember is the punchline. I like to garden and have a doily collection. That’s right, you heard me. Need I say more? Besides, this fo-tog (kinda cool, right?) is kind of dark, broody and dramatic. Maybe he’s too obvious, over the top. Maybe I don’t know what real art is. After all, I’m no artist.

And another thing: who cares what I like or don’t like? Who am I to tell you, “Hey, check this out!! You’ll love it!” Really, when you think about it, how arrogant is the whole nature of blogging? It’s as if one day I woke up and thought, “Hey! I am so hot! Look at me! Yeah, I’m talking to you! You need to check me out! I’m a genius! Do it! You will thank me later! I will change your life! I will turn you on to all the things that I love, like cheese and the color green! I will teach you, nay, I will expand your mind, about lady pirates and breast augmentations and quotes from people you may or may not have heard of! I will alert you to the horrors of pigeons and gangs of marauding raccoons and parasites that worm their way into your body via your urine stream! Good times! Stick with me, and I’ll talk about bad tv and the weird duck I saw when I rode my bike around the lake! WOOOHOO!!!!”

But then I thought, “You really bonded with Tufty” – that’s what I named the duck- and “Lots of people like to think about green and The Biggest Loser!” I’m interesting, right?

And then I thought, “Wait a minute! For whom did you start this blog? I seem to remember, little missy, a certain someone saying to herself, “I like to write! Wouldn’t it be fun to write about anything I want, and then guilt my family and friends into reading it?!” Don’t I write this blog because I like to write, like I’m flexing a dormant muscle, like I enjoy expressing myself, like its a creative outlet that makes me smile and relaxes me? Don’t I feel compelled? I do, I do! And don’t I post it because I am ready to bust out of my diary ad into the world, for anyone or no one, but hopefully for someone, who will read it and smile, or think, or sigh? In the end, don’t we all want to connect to someone else, to share time and experience and feeling, to touch and feel those around us? I do, I do! Pick me!

And then I thought, “Jeez, Louise! What the hell is wrong with you! Just post the guys link and let the chips fall where they may!!!!”

Here’s the link: http://www.flickr.com/photos/brettwalker Click on any of the collections on the right side, select slideshow, and make up your own mind. I’d be very interested in what you think, so let me know if you feel inclined.

That’s what she said!

Posted on by
1

Quotes:
My cousin Alisa, when talking about health care – “Come on, people! Can’t we all just get a lung?”
“I believe in the sun, even when it isn’t shining. I believe in love, even when not feeling it. I believe in God, even when he is silent.”-Inscription on the wall where Jews were hiding from the Nazis.
“Many wealthy people are little more than janitors of their possessions.”-Frank Lloyd Wright
“I am sitting in the smallest room of my house. I have your review before me. In a moment it shall be behind me.” (Composer Max Reiger in response a critic’s letter.) Think about it….think…there ya go!
Pereant, iniquit, aui ante nos nostra dixcrunt. (Confound those who have said our remarks before us.)
“In skating over thin ice, our safety is in our speed.”
“The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Everything that I have done in my life that was worthwhile, I’ve caught hell for.” -Chief Justice Earl Warren
“I had a teacher named Clayford T. Grimm…”-my friend Charles, beginning a story
“Come on, Suckles!” – my friend Mark, urging the end of that story
“Mick Jagger is definitely a robot. They’re doing some experimental shit on him for sure – head in a jar shit, I mean!” -,McAdams, on a road trip.
“Well, ok, life is beautiful! Au revoir!” -My mom, upon hanging up the phone with me.
“Yeah, men melt like butter for you. They melt like butter, and then they leave a greasy stain on whatever you’re wearing.” -Carole “Good Times” Claybour, when I was telling her about how the menfolk just can’t get enough of me.

“The worst part of having pets is knowing they can’t be with you for your entire life. The best part of having a pet is being with them for theirs.” I may have gotten the wording wrong. My friend Lillie said something like this when we were having to euthanize our family dog, Lily. My favorite quotes are the ones like “Loose lips sink ships”. I always mix them up and say them completely wrong but the point gets across somehow….”Don’t throw stones on a glass boat?” “Hey, black kettle! Don’t call me Pot.” – From Emily, who is pretty in pink.

Got any more, blogsters? Bring it!

Is it just me?

Posted on by
Reply

I just read an article in Time magazine online about Sarah Palin’s first big speech to an audience abroad, a group of investors in Hong Kong. Not too much is known about the content of the approximately 90 minute speech, because all press was banned, though people interviewed later said the oratory was heavy on a matter of a global interest: Alaska. Ms. Palin spoke of relevant Alaskan history, such as “Alaska’s land bridges with Asia and how animals once went across.”
I gotta say, I just loved this article. Read it yourself if you’d like: http://www.time.com/time/politics/article/0,8599,1925657,00.html The best part of it were the last lines: Shown a picture of Palin, a woman surnamed Ng, who operated a food stand near the Grand Hyatt, professed to not know who she was. “If she is rich and famous, then maybe she goes shopping nearby,” said Ng from behind her counter. “Afterward, she can come eat my fishballs.”

Sarah Palin can eat my fish balls. Classic, right?

Cool cyber-places

Posted on by
Reply

Here are some cool cyber-places to visit:
1. http://www.helpingstepbystep.blogspot.com This blog is by a 14 year old kid, David Ashby, who is walking from Orlando, Florida to Washington, DC, over the summer. For those of you counting, that’s 1,100 miles. He’s doing this because he wants to bring attention to homeless youth in America, and so he is not only walking the walk, he’s living the life. He is only eating what he find on the streets, and he is staying in shelters. As a teacher, I am so impressed by this kid. As a human, I am humbled by him and the commitment of his friends and family. Try to check this one out before Aug. 15th.
2. http://puteraaladin.blogspot.com This site is dedicated to graphic design. It has some cool videos and interesting things. Some of them are totally over my head; what’s GIMP?
3. http://poetryjabberwocky.blogspot.com This blog is funny! The writer is an American in England, who uses a poetry form to talk about what is going on in her life or things she is currently pondering.
4. http://newpages.com This site and its blog are all about independent magazines, literary journals, bookstores, and record labels, and the blog has a lot of stuff about writing contests and programs. Way cool if you are into that stuff.
5. www.etsy.com Don’t know about etsy yet? Unbelievable! It is a huge site where people sell all kinds of stuff that they make themselves. Remember, my birthday is just around the corner!
6. http://a.parsons.edu/~dezsoa This woman is an artist who teaches at Parsons. I think she’s fabulous.
7. http://foundmagazine.com Outstanding! If you haven’t already, you must check this out!
8. http://engrish.com From Denichiwa, our Japanese correspondent.
9. http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days Maybe it’s just me; I love this site and can get lost on it for hours…
10. http://informationnation.blogspot.com One of those blogs chock full o’stuff; it has some funny videos and weird/amusing/interesting photos…

I know of some other interesting sites, but they are secrets. Sorry!

Witnessed

Posted on by
Reply

So, remember way back in June when I posed Writer’s Challenge #2? It had to do with writing about something that had been witnessed; the form of the piece was left open. I gotta say, though several of you said you were excited about this challenge, I wasn’t exactly flooded with responses; however, since this was only the second one offered, I guess technically it is the second most popular EVER in Smaller Adventure history, so YAY!!!! Keep up the good work, peeps!

The staff here at the blog was delighted to receive three cool witness poems, and so, in no particular order, here they are:

Mary Pierce Armstrong said…
motes float in the gray ray

from the bench, a scowl

turkey neck folds dip and bob

a nod, quick and bored

the witness approaches with downcast gaze

her fingers outline a blur with vibration

oath taken

seat taken

time taken

I become the hostile witness
July 31, 2009 11:45 AM

Alisa R. said…
Mathematical Witness

Simple Tuesday carpool

Is there a math quiz today?

Staring out the window I see him

minus all clothing

plus 1 tangent man part

divided cheeks as he leans over to get the newspaper

adding to my knowledge

but multiplying my wonder.

Did I really see that?
August 2, 2009 5:57 PM

The Forest. RIP. Jan. 24/09
By Liliane Richman

The forest resisting
arching and groaning
under the rush of violent winds
succumbed to the last tree
each mature pine falling
embracing its neighbor
the crush of branches
littering of giants on the ground.

“You should have heard the howling,”
says my dear Paulette.

“The forest is dead.
Killed by a roaming cyclone
imported by global warming.”

Paulette is 82 years old
lives alone and walks with a slow shuffle.
She had no water for a week
no electricity for two
no telephone, no television.
She was cold and stayed in bed all day

And wishes she were younger
to move from her ancestral home
far from this desolation.
“You know how
how long it takes
to regrow such tall pines?”

Ah, Paulette, I’m with you
mourning for the forest, the ferns,
the sap, the deep silence, the cicadas
the pines are cut through
a long incision near the bottom of the trunk

the amber colored resin
collecting in a clay pot
sent to the one existing factory
the commercial hub
of the townlet in its heyday
when you father was CEO

Once upon a time it was
Nineteen forty-two
I appeared in your family
grew up and thrived
and departed again
then returned year after year
as late as last summer
surrounded by you
and the forest

of tall pines that died
on January twenty four
two thousand and nine.