Yesterday, when I started my usual downward trending spiral into malaise for Monday, I remembered something rare and magnificent – I’m on vacation!
Oh, vacation! How you thrill me! Vacation makes me adorable and sexy, like a kitten-cougar! Me-ROAR! Here are some of the many fabulous things I will do:
1. Perfect my shower tap dance routine
2. Make soup and apple sauce – It’s getting to be Fall out there, peeps! Time for warm yum in a bowl!
3. Take lots of pictures of things like leaves, my shadow, birds on wires, soup, and how the light glows in the windows of strangers on my way home from the lake. Invasion of what?
4. Ride my bike while wearing a poncho that has red and white fringe – WHEEEE!!!!!
5. Go for long walks and wave at the ducks
6. Get a mani/pedi: Shiny au natural with little white tips on my fingers, classy like Audrey Hepburn, and trash-glam, skank-black on my toes like Courtney Love
7. Read my new book. It’s called Olive Kitteridge, by Elizabeth Stroud, and so far I give it double thumbs up!
8. Take naps
10. Go to the movies – there’s nothing I really want to see, but what the hell! I like a good communal experience in the dark with strangers! How bad can it be, right?
11. Shop! I love this season! I can shop like I’m insane and say I’m doing it for others. Man, I love that! Spirit of giving and such, what what?! So far I have picked out all of my brother-in-laws-stuff, bought McAdams a trinket, and got myself a necklace with a tiny, delicate sparrow on it that hangs right in the hollow space where my clavicles begin. So cute! I keep running to the mirror to look at it again. Really, it’s better to give and to receive! Thank you, me! It’s just what I wanted!
12. Read the Sunday NYT! I love the NYT, but so many words, so little time! Now I have all week to become even more supercilious and condescending about all of the things about which I know better than you! I’m so clevah!!!!
13. Sleep. I’ve had wicked insomnia lately. I think that’s all about to change…
14. Spend time with people I love.
And then, as if all that weren’t enough, it’s Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday! Yay, Gratitude! Hip, hip, hooray for taking stock of all the things that make life so damned sweet! What a great week this is! What a great season! Woohooo! Happy Happy, Peeps!